Video Diary; 06/21/2014 – Being Married, Being Single..

Featured Vloggers of Asia.. http://retiringphilippines.org
Travels Videos For You.. http://www.travelvids4you.com
My Covid-Virus News & Stats.. http://virusnewsupdateslive.com

My (New) Facebook.. https://www.seetheph.com
Study-up On Dating Filipinas.. http://www.phbachelor.com
Skype-Consult w/Reekay.. http://bit.ly/reekayfacetimeconsult
Support LifeBeyondTheSea.. https://www.paypal.me/reekay

Airbnb Is How I Travel.. http://bit.ly/airbnb-reekay
Loctote Security Bag.. http://bit.ly/reekayloctotebag
How I Transfer Money.. http://bit.ly/transferwisereekay
My MP3 Audio-Series.. http://bit.ly/ReekaysTravelMP3s
View My Videos by Category here.. http://bit.ly/reekays-video-playlists

Need A Fiancee’ Visa? http://www.filipina-expat-visa4you.com
Get Vietnam Visa Online.. http://bit.ly/vietnam-visa-online
Get an Expat Travel Insurance Quote.. http://www.bit.ly/expat-travel-insurance-quote
Translate Your Youtube Video Details into other languages.. http://bit.ly/Youtube-Title-Description-Translator
Easily Create Your Own Youtube Channel.. http://bit.ly/Video-Content-Creator-Reekay

#philippines #reekay #vietnam

63 comments

    1. Hi henry
      i enjoyed your video , ive just come out of a 25 year marriage , ive been living on my own for about 10 months now and i have not got into a relationship with a woman , ive been dating and all i can say is that whats available is not pretty unless you like large ladies . I was watching my friends at a barbie yesterday and some of them are totally controlled by their wifes . Im in your shoes at the moment , i really dont know what i want , im scared of being alone , yet i dont want the control that comes with marriage . i can see the benefits of marrying a younger fillipno lady . If im honest im enjoying being single ,and im scared of getting into another marriage , i can understand why a pinay girl would want the security of marriage . If all goes well my end and once ive sold my house , ill step on a plane and take a look at the phillipines , at the moment i really dont know what i want .

  1. Hi Henry, I live in Cincinnati and have been married twice like you, both times I was young also like you. I have been single for about 25 years now, And I would get married again in a heartbeat…. If I thought I found the right one, But thats the trick, right? lol.  I have come to believe that she is on the other side of the planet. Maybe you will see me looking for her in the Philippines, I am going to Cebu in September. Good Luck to you, And keep posting these great videos. 

  2. Nice to hear that You are sure that You are not sure… – It´s  always a good start on the future that We for the most part have behind us perhaps – but – Best Regards from Stockholm Sweden and Good Luck My Friend…

  3. Hi Henry,
    I think your rule of waiting at least 12 months is a good one. You need to get all ‘the data’ on the other person first and feel comfortable that you really do know them.
    Some important things may not even raise their head until a few months have passed.  Also, the first few months are the honeymoon stage – so go slow and get to know each other and good luck.
    I don’t want to be negative, but if it doesn’t work out, there are a few million other Filipina’s ready to take her place. Good luck!!

  4. Its really great to hear your thoughts each upload. I hope you find happiness in whatever form that ends up. Keep living life Henry cant wait for the next instalment.

  5. Henry… now that you have a tripod screw on your Go-Pro…get a Joby GorillaPod Tripod… they are cheap, light and attach to all kinds of stuff.  I also use mine for hand held – steady cam shots, extension shots and selfies!  I have seen them in photo shops at the Malls there.  http://joby.com/gorillapod   I know… you are trying to be sneeky and not too obvious with your camera.

    1. I have the tripod, the problem is that the camera has to be held in a case and the one it came in is mostly for underwater, so it muffles the audio.  I need a ‘frame’ that doesn’t cover up the mic holes.  They’re sold out in Dumaguete right now.

  6. test out holding a small piece of sponge over your microphone beside a fan its a great trick for preventing wind noise on the mic. I improvised mine with a 5 mm thick sponge and some tape 😀

  7. I don’t understand why people think they need to be married to
    be together ??? You can be single, and live with a single woman
    for the rest of your life. Why do you need some authority, be it a
    church or government to say your “legally married.” You don’t have
    any extra benefits by being married. Just a lot of hassles if the marriage
    doesn’t work. Look at the divorce rates that are prevalent today at 50%.
        In my mind people will stay together if their in love with each other
    and are committed to each other. You don’t need to have some piece
    of paper to think you have permission. If you can get beyond the religious
    expectations you have–that you should be married, why not just live
    together just as if you were married. It’s really the same thing, only way
    better, because your staying together for the love of each other.

    1. You raise a very good question Grant. Marriage is embedded in many cultures in the world. The various religions in the world talk about marriage. However there are some cultures where there is no concept of marriage or husband and wife. For the Mosuo culture there is no concept of husband and wife.

    2.   Well said jim- I totally agree with you on this.
      Yes, the bible is a good doctrine to live your
      life by, and if more people did, we’d be living
      in a beautiful place. People need structure, so
      it seems, and there’s nothing wrong with the way
      that Big Tom thinks–however we’re living in the
      real world, and you have to make life decisions
      based on life’s experience.

    3. @jim nichols- Hey Jim, so nice to see there are people like you around
      that can think for themselves. As educated and sophisticated as a lot of
      people are today, they are still very insecure, and lifestyles that follow the
      norm, like marriage, seem to soothe them, and make their lives feel right.
      Their really are few people that can live by their own beliefs and feel good
      about it–it seems they need confirmation from what they view as a higher
      authority, to make things right. ( they can’t set forth their own agenda) I’m not
      against marriage, but now that I’m older I view it as a form of social engineering,
      that was meant at one time to keep families together. ( worked well in 1950’s)
          Anyways Jim, I’m much the same as you, and I’m 60 yrs old, had tons of
      girlfriends in my time, and some real beauties as well. Now that I’m older
      all I can attract here in Canada is ladies from 38-48-divorced with 2-3 bratty
      kids with all kinds of problems–just not my thing. Just like yourself Jim, I’ve
      never been married. ( we are much the same kind of people)
         I have a lot of life in me, and I’m really attracted to the young ones–say 20-
      to 28 years old, with nice firm bodies–the kind of always had. Also the
      younger ones are way more fun, and make you feel younger. I may want to
      even start a family, as I’ve never had kids ??? don’t know yet though???
        I’m looking for a quality guy that I can travel with in the Phils, that’s looking
      for what I am. I’d like this more for security purposes, if going out late at
      night, or if a tense situation comes up. I’d also like to make good friends
      with like minded people like myself, that I can have good commradary with
      and enjoy some good conversations with. Sort of going thru the phrase of
      remaking new friends. ( just like in hi-school-have to remake the wheel)
          I’m in Canada, and will send you an inmail to your Youtube inbox, and
      maybe we can become friends. Look forward to hearing back from you,
      and making a quality friend Jim–Grant ( in Canada)

  8. Don’t worry Henry when you find the right girl you will know and then there still isn’t a hurry.  April must be one special girl though to get you thinking so much.  Hopefully I will see you in a few months when I am there.  Dumaguete seems like a nice place to check out.

  9. I like your videos  keep them coming. I was single for twenty four years and decided that I needed some one that I could love again and love me , you could say I was gun shy.

    As a friend of mine talked me into  going to the Philippines to Cebu where I met my wife  . 

    I do not have any regrets being single for so long.

    I think what I am trying to say is its a personal  choice  .

    I wish you all the best in what ever you decide the thing is just be happy.

    Bruce

  10. FYI for the American guys who have no experiance with the Philippines. The Philippine passport , which the girls have to travel on, is worthless. So if you have a girlfriend or wife in the Philippines, she just can’t travel to the states with you. That is why the subject of marriage is so much more important than if you had a girlfriend in the US. Having a GF in the Philippines is not  like having a GF in the USA.////

  11. Johnspot ,Careful you are going to fall in love 100 times there lol.  Make  many trips and try to stay at least a month each time . The Filipina from Cebu are very beautiful and also very nice . Best of luck. Henry thanks again . Sounds like you are already on the fence with this one.  You  seem to get excited when you talk about her .  Hope things work out for ya . Aloha

  12. Henry, I have tried to write to you in different ways but you have not replied to any of my contact efforts, sure wish you would, what is best way to contact you?  Oh well, enjoying my stay so far, going to Bohol next week for 1 month.

    1. Best way to reach me is on facebook, search me under ‘Reekay’.  I’m still catching up on a backlog of messages but let me know what your username is on facebook and I’ll look for it.

  13. What if you get sick or if you are already in bad health who will take care of you a caregiver or a old folks home ? I think a Filipina wife is the better choice to take care of you but here in the USA they just put you in the old folks home  at are ages we can have a heart attack or go into bad health at any time   

    1. if you’re single people are asking were your girlfriend, if you have girlfriend people ask when do you get married, if you are married people ask when do you have a child, if you hava a son people   ask when do your next child a daugther this time, after than people ask the house, an soo on…,i think people are trap on this illusion.

    2. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Your right bro honest and trust is hard to find even in a caregiver  or wife in a way you will be paying both of them 

    3. It’s a gamble either way.  With money, I could hire a caretaker.. but finding a trustworthy one, that is the hard part.  🙁  Much better to have a wife who I can trust.  But.. that takes time to find the right one.

  14. LOL I like what Matt said.  I feel you man. 🙂   When I was dating in the states, all I could find was other guys damaged goods.  As for you Henry, you’re doing great.  I like the way you think through things. I figure you’re allowed 3 marriages. LOL  I can’t afford any more.  If this one doesn’t work out, I’ll just call it quits, and become one of those guys that travels around on my bike, picking up girls as I go.  LOL 

  15. love your blog Henry , i was married for 29 years , i retire soon to move to the Philippines, , i have been to the Philippines  many times, i have done the bar girl thing in angeles but i am tired of the ‘i leave now ‘ at 7am , so now i am looking for a live in girl friend,  

  16. Most people have no problem speaking from the heart and being honest to a close friend, but to let it all out on Youtube for everyone to see is brave. Please continue doing what you are doing. We can tell that you are a gentleman and I am sure most of us are happy hearing that good things are happening in your life. You have given me a lot to think about thanks to many of your terrific and informative videos.

  17. I’m in the same boat divorced now single and not sure weather I want to marry again or not.  I have no plans on moving back to Philippines since my home is here in the USA since 75.  I really enjoy living here plus I’ve never dated or had the opportunity to date a filipina.

  18. Actually,

    In my humble opinion… For a single male western foreigner living in a country like the Philippines it is actually detrimental to get legally married. I don’t live in the Philippines but I travel to the Philippines for about two weeks every two months. (I work in Guam and I own a condo in Manila so it’s really cheap for me to visit the Philippines often) and I plan to retire there.

    Dating is incredibly easy. You could feasibly date a different pretty girl every single day for the next year without dating the same girl twice with very little difficulty and the vast majority of the girls you date you will want a long term, committed relationship with you leading towards marriage. Romantically, foreign stock is quite high in the Philippines. It’s actually harder to remain single for a whole year than it would be to start a brand new relationship every single week for a year.

    Why would a single healthy male foreigner want to get married in the Philippines? Especially given that there is no divorce in the Philippines.

    Gorgeous women are plentiful, dates are miraculously easy to come by, relationships are practically on demand and “physical intimacy” is not at all difficult to come by.

    Unless you want to buy land or change your legal status for business purposes then the negatives for a foreigner getting married to a Filipina in the Philippines FAR outweigh the positives.

    If you are one of those people who moved to the Philippines for freedom, low cost of living and a care free lifestyle then getting married to a Filipina would practicality negate the very reason for moving there in the first place.

    Dating, having a girlfriend and maintaining your freedom is like having all the positives of getting married without any of the negatives.

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines you’re absolutely right Reekay. While I’m more towards the “drink deep, or taste not the cup of the philippines” camp, I can see that you’re the kind of gentleman who values quality over quantity. That makes you even MORE of a catch in the P. I. The ball is totally in your court here. Any woman you are with is lucky and she’ll know it. The harder you try to remain single, the harder she will try to prove that you would be crazy not to marry her. Which puts you in an awesome position. Hehe. Perpetual honeymoon mode. From what I gather about you in your talk on love and relationships, Your a one woman guy. Find the girl of your dreams and stick with it until it doesn’t feel “right” anymore. Since ending up alone in the Philippines is nowhere near as likely as it might be in America you can basically have your cake and eat it too as long as you stay selective astute and keep your wits about you. You can be in a faithful, committed, loving relationship AND stay in honeymoon mode indefinitely.

    2. You make some excellent points.  As I consider the happily married expats I know, I’d say for them the greatest benefit is that sense of commitment they’ve taken publicly and personally.  And that is a great thing, I’m not knocking it in the least.  But.. from a practical standpoint, if a man is not “in love” and living in the PH.. dating around has all the advantages you mentioned.  Now, granted, it also comes with the potential for drama with every single new girl one encounters.  Law of averages here is that a good portion, say at least 30% of the random girls ‘dated’ are primed and ready to create some drama that is to their own advantage.  And then there’s the whole std issue, unplanned pregnancies (not an issue for guys like me who got a vasectomy years ago) and the occasional jealous filipino b/f who shows up out of nowhere.  It’s all ying/yang.. pros/cons either way.  Me.. for now I am very committed to remaining Single until someone comes along to make me want to change that on a permanent basis.  

  19. Hi, I like your videos. I have also lived in Dumaguete City. I see you are filming in front of the WHY NOT Dico bar. Your favourite hangout?  It used to be mine..lol

  20. How’s it going Henry? I really do enjoy your videos and as far as this one goes I can only speak from the other side of the spectrum, I was also married at the age of 19 but that is where our similarity ends. I have been married to the same wonderful women for 42 years so unless my wife goes on before me I must live my life vicariously through you. I hope you find someone one you can trust soon because it seems to me that trust is very high on your priority list, dare is say a little too high? I think, love, commitment and compatibility outweigh trust but I guess that’s just me.

  21. I talked to a lawyer in the United States and they told me the laws in the Philippines allow a woman to get half your assets even if married only one day. In the State of Washington when married as an older person what you bring into the marriage is 100% yours and cannot be split 50/50  only after 10 years of marriage. If divorced before 10 years you split only the assets you have acquired together during that 10 year period.It does not matter where you have been married..but it does matter where divorce or annullment papers are filed.  i was suprised you did not speak to this very important and critical issue. After 40 year of work who want to give up half their assets after only a week or more of marriage..not good Thomas Wilbur  Seattle, Washington

  22. Brother Grant, the reason many guys get married–again–when it’s so illogical to do so is to exploit various government benefits. Once you reach the age of social security, you can increase your benefits by 50% by being married and wanking out a kid.

    If you import your Pinay to the USA for 10 years, she gets half your social security payment when you kick-off.

    I can’t imagine why Social Security is failing? LOL!

  23. This is a problem anywhere you have more money and status than the average guy in the society you live in. Is it true divorce is illegal in the Philippines? What kind of dangers does marriage hold for a man in that country? I’ve heard of the pushy pinay families always longing to devour a foreign husband’s wealth. Are these the kind of dangers you refer to?

    Cheers

  24. Having been married twice, I never want to go down that path again, especially after spending too much time in the PI… The only reason to get married is if you want to have kids… All a kano has to do to find a woman in the PI is to have a pulse… Marriage for me is like hitting your thumb with a hammer… After you do it a couple times, you realize that it hurts and you stop doing it… Especially with pinays whose genetic disposition is to insane jealousy and tampo… Stay single dude, you will be much happier in the long run…

    1. I am somewhat like-minded these days.  If I do remarry it is to have a REAL relationship the way it’s meant to be.  Until then I won’t make that commitment. 

  25. H,
    wow married at 19.
    on windy days or by the water try a wind sock for better sound on windy days
    or literally a sock cut a hole for the lens. I’m guessing ur using ur go pro more now coz well ur images are wide angle

    love ur videos ur my go to guy when it comes to my country n dating protocols there
    thanks bro ur awesome
    n good luck
    G

  26. Henry….Could you make a video on your experience – or someones – regarding a professional, aged 72 and a PhD finding a woman that is similar and NOT a young woman.

  27. Lol I don’t understand why people re-marry… The purpose or reason people do get married is to prove their love to eachother right? (I know it’s a hassle and what not and I know you don’t have to go through all the paper work for that) but that’s the main reason right? So when you marry someone you’re putting everything in the circle, trust, honesty, love, care etc. and completely sure 100% know the the person you’re marrying is your one true love or one true person in life. I don’t know what the reasons was on the two divorces but I think it’s a little annoying how some people are treating it like a game. (Oh yeah let’s marry) .. (A year later: divorce). Like you see old people who have been married for like what 40-50 years? And people now are like married for 5 years then divorce. The main reason (don’t quote me of this) for divorce is “it didn’t work out”. But before marrying someone isn’t that part of the thought process of knowing if you should marry that person?

    1. @Rikle Peralta I don’t know about 5 star, but the Alona Kew resort and the Alona Tropical Beach resort are def worth checking out via Google.  both a pretty nice.

Leave a Reply