The Other Side of Filipina Jealousy – Philippines

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110 comments

  1. I have a 23 yo daughter and the lack of responsibility of that generation of Filipinos, is the same as in the States. Selfish, irresponsible, arrogant and entitled.

    1. No that video was ok sound was ok to your Go pro picks you voice over the background ok I bought a like go pro its Nav 8 r its water proof I have a screen can see what  im doing its a cheep one but good look some my videos I use it some my vidios only was 98 dollars aust

    2. Thanks, I keep looking for new areas to shoot that aren’t so noisy but still have people around.  Inside the mall is too noisy and security probably be a hassle.

  2. Well well, i get back on line for a short time to check my personal biz and there you are with the perfect video for my fiancee to watch. You can get the CENOMAR in Dumaguete at the NSO office. Cost is 195php each person. Yes i am back here and this time with plans to stay. Then you need Legal Capacity for 50 USD. Original Birth Certificate of both parties or long form birth certificate.Has at least 3 photocopies of each item listed. 6 hours seminar and the cost of that process is 1,125 Php.10 day waiting period, marriage with the mayor is civil. Or you can have the church wedding.Plans for July 16th wedding. Now to the jealousy..lol. When i take her 2 children to school she knows how long it should take and will when i got back, knowing how she is, i waited outside to see how long it would take for her to check and see if i was back yet. 10  mins later the door opened and her head popped out. yes there is that insecuruty and knownledge of how other Filipino’s can be. But we have a trust that is growing and for her the marriage is the proof she needs. This is a ongoing 3 year relationship which after spending 7 years talking to many others came to meet Naomi. The people here know me and are happy for her since they know her well. If i am out alone they will ask where she is expecting to see her with me always. She is a good woman and the most beautiful woman in the world to me. We are also expecting a child mid Jan 2015. Thanks for the video’s and maybe 1 day we cross paths. I am here in Argao Cebu.

    1. 2 prices here for sure from department to mom and pop store. you should of recorded them saying the price lol then what can they say but they just trying to make a living its just a fact of life. a rusco? if it was they are small.

    2. @Michael Mcfarland Yes that also Michael. I also noticed when we engage in cash transactions they will try to charge more or change the price. Had multicab and motorcycle washed. price quoted was 150php. When the guy was done it went up 30php and tried to say it was because it was so big. We have a small one and even tho it is only 30php i said have a nice day here is 150php. Naomi was with me also as she translate for me. Peace

    3. Thansk for the awesome and detailed information!  That is definitely something I’ll copy/save in Notepad for.. whenever I decide to take that plunge myself.  🙂  For now, I’m staying single until I meet the one who changes my mind.  

  3. Nice wrap up of a very hot topic. I will leave the issue of the younger generations ethics and morals alone,  except to say that looking at today’s banksters,corporate leaders and politicians, they sure don’t have many positive role models.

    1. I agree.  Although it’s my theory that for all the ‘good’ the internet has brought, it’s also encouraged some of the more liberal ideas that tear away at the moral fiber that was once a strong part of the culture here in the PH.

  4. You bring some interesting points here. I believe that each couple needs to find the own balance, and that trust does not come for free but needs to be earned. It takes time and efforts to reach that point in inter-cultural relationships, but I am convinced that a relationship which is built on serious efforts and dedication towards the other will last and lead to mutual happiness. 

  5. Good video Henry…I sat my Filipina down and we both watched this video together.  Jealousy has been the biggest of our problems, next to communication and words meaning different things.  We’ve been watching your videos for 2 years and I moved here last December.  Thanks~~

  6. You got your wiki data all wrong. its not 2.3 million foreigners, its 4,681,307 total http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tourism_in_the_Philippines
    Also. Remember! korean, japanese,chinese etc, .. “asian foreigners” are legit foreigners that look for and find filipinas for relationships and marriage, not just the blue, white skinned you mention, and the “white skinned people you mention , blue eyes or not, is more like 1.142 million not 650k, the koreans, are app. 25 percent of tourists, and usa is app.15 percent and  total asian tourists is closer to 50 percent than 75 percent  if you reduced by half to take in consideration  women you are way off there as the vast majority of foreign tourists there are indeed male and also remember that these stats do not include ofw filipinio, and balikbayans

    Rank Country 2013
    1 South Korea  1,165,789
    2 United States 674,564
    3 Japan 433,705
    4 China 426,352
    5 Australia 213,023
    6 Singapore 175,034
    7 Taiwan 139,099
    8 Canada131,381
    9 United Kingdom 122,759
    10 Malaysia 109,437
    total 4,681,307

    1. Wiki only gave whole numbers, it didn’t break it down to how many of those expats were male or female.  So, by default I ballparked the 4.6 million down to 2.3 million because female expats (one Half of the 4.6 million) are not coming to the PH to marry Filipinas.   Same thing with the 1.142 “cacuasian” expats coming in to the PH.. divide by two (roughly) to figure that about 650,000 or so are MALE expats that a Filipina might interact with.  Again, since Wiki did not give a breakdown that was more specific, these numbers are used as a reference point.  But not all of the 4.6 or the 1.142 could be said to be 100% male expats.

  7. Bro your spot on! I live in Sweden and I wanna be the center of attention too thats why I wanna come there to have a hot date :)…sorry to say there not that many over this side. Any way good vid henry 😉

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines haha 🙂 i guess you’re right. I love your vids. I want to travel there soon. What is the one place to stay for a month if you would choose after your experience ? 

  8. Great subject Henry.Many westerners go to the philippines to find a wife ,with that so to speak “old fashioned attitudes about marriage.However once you bring them to your home country things will change.The cat calls from younger men or maybe they begin to think they can in fact find a wealthier man than yourself also the age diff can become more of a problem than it would have been had you stayed in philly.I believe the safest way to go is to either never bring them to the wild west or if you do….plan on returning to retire there as soon as possible!!

    1. Wild west is the best place for her to be if she can adjust to culture cat call rarely happen you can get your ass kick or shot in America for that. She will get guys looking at her that normal if she hot that can happen in Philippines as well. Thank GOD for sex harassment laws.

  9.   Hi Henry …what was your job ..Are you a teacher at the University ….i like the way you Explain things  … that i think we should meet someday….thanks

  10. Love your videos, Henry!  Just wish I saw them prior to meeting my Fiancee. You are spot on, as usual, and I believe it’s all about communication and just being plain ‘ol honest.  She will be here in the States in the coming months and you have brought up a very good point.  The tables will turn and she will be the center of attraction…guaranteed!  I have been very transparent with her and I am also being realistic.  I am somewhat worried that she might find somebody better than me, but I’m just keeping an open mind about it.  Whether it’s good or bad, honesty is the best policy…heck, when I see a pretty girl, I tell my fiancee how I feel…I am constantly reassuring her that I will not leave her in the hopes that she won’t be jealous.  Hey, why lie about it, you know?  Less to stress over.  She certainly can say the same if she sees somebody attractive.  However, if she acts on it, then that’s a different story.  I always tell her that she is the greatest thing to happen to me and to let her go, would be just plain stupid.  I am just so happy that she loves me and cares for me…here’s hoping she doesn’t turn when she get here to the States.
    Well, I, too, live in SoCal where there’s a good amount of Filipinos here, so hopefully the stigma of meeting a blue-eyed, blonde/brunette man will be alot less, but still, you never know.  Also, it’s the American born Pinays (or most women) here too…hope she doesn’t get “corrupted” with their never-ending quest for high end bags, cars & clothes that someone else had mentioned here, haha.   Better yet, I’ll just keep her in the house with no internet/cell phone/tv haha.  Just kidding.  We are so blessed to have this relationship and God has a plan for everybody.  Just gotta’ keep the faith, stay honest and cherish the relationship as best we can.
    Anyways, keep up the good work and maybe we’ll meet someday!

  11. Some real good points there Henry, you really do put things in perspective,
    like when the shoe is on the other foot, and the guy brings the girl “home.”
    I wonder if you prescript your videos with certain points, or do you just start
    talking ??? If you do, your a pretty some talker, no mumbling, or stumbling
    at all. Your on your way to becoming a movie start here Henry.

    1. I tried working from notes on a card my first video.. it was a complete disaster, i deleted it.  I analyze things all the time, it’s just how I am so maybe a minute or two before starting the camera, I just collect my thoughts and “wing it” from there.  That works much better for me than writing anything down.

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines
      -that’s a good one Henry–had to laugh when I read that- you have to
      be able to laugh at yourself sometimes in this life.

    2. all seriousness aside, your videos are both thoughtful and thought provoking and I’m learning how to look at things from the pinays’ perspective through the influence of your insights and ideas… Its great to understand where and why other people are coming from and be able to relate to them much easier as a result…

  12. My Filipina was good for two years and then started the jealousy on me out of the blue. Straight away I told her to stop the crap. I said that it’s my way and not her way and that it will never ever be her way. I wont put up with women’s crap. I haven’t heard any jealousy since. Women want to control and dominate men because they depend on us for their survival but if you take their crap you’ll pay forever. Best to tell them to shut it straight away – FIRST time!!

    1. I don’t believe so, Brother Henry.  I think he merely spoke to her in a vernacular that even she could understand: knock off with the jealousy shit before my size 12, triple wide boot launches your ass right back to Mama’s house!  You might say that he did not treat her as a child but held her accountable for her actions.  I’ll add “Tampo” to my “boot” list, also.  

    2. So.. essentially, just treat her like a child rather than have a discussion with her as an adult.  I feel sorry for this woman already.

  13. Very good topic Henry. I have been married to my Filipina wife for a year and a half and we are doing very well. It just takes a lot of patience (by both of us lol), understanding, and yes …. from time to time – a very deep breath or two. The cure for jealousy seems to be – trust and trust is earned slowly over time but you do need to maintain it. By “maintain it” I mean – put your partners feelings above your desires or think of them first. If you truly love your partner you will do this naturally. The great thing in my situation is … my wife does the same for me – she is Great. Again good topic Henry – keep up the good work. 

  14. great advice, you covered the most important aspect and that is transparency, I have been with my sweetheart for 3 years now and I had to really do some cultural 101 to figure out why just being completely honest was not dispelling the jealousy that seemed to come by default with her, I didn’t give up on the relationship and neither did she, with time she has realized that I wanted to be with her and no one else but it just took some time,  while we think that we are the ones trying to adjust to them, they are getting used to dealing with a different culture also, keep the videos coming, very insightful as usual.

    1. They “should” trust each other, and need to.  Jealousy erodes that trust.  In the beginning, trust takes time, but once it’s earned should not be repeatedly questioned without a good reason for it.

  15. Yeah – pretty much on point – my wife and I are retired and living in Naga, near her family.  All is good most of the time, but everything is done together.  I cannot shake the leash; which is okay – just somewhat tiresome.  Oh well – I can live with it.  We are the same age – 65 – so it all works out.  Enjoy your videos – well done.

  16. To me jealousy with the ladies is very bad that why I left my lady she was from Cebu she was 47 and 53 and I did the paper work she change that why I hate the jealousy  end our love life

  17. I had a philipina that once told me she was going to kill me in silent..would you know what that meant Hernry? are they serious when they say such? kind of scary words to say to one..apparently jeolous type.i was kind of wondering how would they kill in silent..would it be while im asleep ? or would theyput poison in your drink? mm kind makes you think huh? anyways had to ditch the bitch

  18. Its true what you say. I have been in a relationship with a Pina lady for 3 years and she wants to visit Australia but i have heard many bad stories about them running off with younger guys. So that’s why i visit here in the Philippines nearly every month.

  19. Henry..these Philipinas are mellow dramatic..i am sure you know that by now.this one wasnt sweet obviously.some are not trsutworthy.got to be careful

  20. As usual you are right on target. 🙂    I guess I’ve been lucky with my wife.  She’s not attracted  to the younger guys where I live.   I told her once, ” you sleep with babes you get pee’d on”.  My ex taught me that one. LOL     and as for me.  At my age and experience,  One wife is enough, and she’s already a hand full.  I couldn’t be happier with her.  Yes, we have moments when I’d like to chock her. (  oh, oh, did I say that out loud?), and I’m sure she has felt the same, but that’s marriage. LOL
    I am gone from home for a week at a time working, so we really have to trust each other , or it just won’t last.

  21. Hey, they wanted that “White guy experience”… I say =cD ENJOY!

    Don’t look so much @ skin color, look more @ personality.

    LOL, they get nooo sympathy from me.

    Maybe I’m a douche?

  22. i agree with you, jealousy happens in all cultres.
    with my filipina fiance, when we first started i had girls that were friends (thats it) she did struggle a little a little to accept that
    eg when i told i was helping this girl move houses “whos this girl was like the first response”
    Out of the single Filipinas here in NZ they seem to be interested in white guys and i often joke about saying “what about a nice decent filipino guy”.
    they often laugh and tell me they lazy, they cheat they drink etc etc.
    i also notice that filipinas hate geeting tanned and buy a lot of moisturiser to make themselves appear whiter.
    but yeah been a foreigner in a different country makes a little more attractive.
    reading other comments about american woman when i was in the states for 6 months i noticed american girls oh god they love to talk about themselves and man do they talk,

  23. They need to play your video’s on a Jumbo-tron at the airport’s so foreign males can get a handle on the cultural dynamic at play in the Philippines.  Kind of a “Welcome to Manilla (or wherever, single American fools) 101.”  This is really good stuff, thank you..

  24. Good video, and very true. I traveled  to the PI some 15 times since 2006, enjoyed the fruits of being an American in the rural Philippines, married a girl 20 years younger and brought her home. Then she was the commodity and I was just an average ‘joe’– and she knew it. Especially if she goes to work or goes to school.. it’s inevitable. Guys would openly flirt with her and she defintely enjoyed it. She divorced me accusing me of being jealous— which I was.

    1. Her flirting days should have been over she never loved you in first place probable immature if she dose that. A good Philipina wont do that she is loyal. Being jelious will destroy a marriage

  25. One more thing, many guys I know who have married Filipinas and stay married and call it a ‘success’ are these, “old fart, I don’t care what she’s doing at night as long as she brings it home to grandpa types”. That wasn’t me and my wife had no problem cutting me loose as soon as I even mentioned divorce.

    1. My situation is weird too. My ex wife and I have two beautiful kids together. She divorced me 2012. Now we are back living together in my new house. We are also planning to visit the PI in June. After she divorced me, I started flirting with alot of her relatives and friends on line and I left my Ipad over at her house deliberately (knowing that she’d snoop it), and was even planning a trip to visit another girl. I work for an airline and its easy for me to travel there for free. It’s amazing how quickly her attitude changed.

    2. @Michael Hulbert i’ve seen so many types of ‘arrangements’ (sealed with marriage) which, as you said, don’t resemble a traditional marriage. i know one guy, spent a few years living with his main g/f plus a variety of ‘helpers’ that came and went. the whole time he slept with the two. eventually he married the one and still keeps a helper in his bed with his wife. i know another guy, not married, but has a ‘happy’ relationship with his g/f. spends 90% of his time living with only her and pays for her schooling. but every so often he goes to his other home where he visits his other girl on another island. (with the first girl’s knowledge) and then there’s another guy i know, he wants to go out in a blaze.. he has a super-sexy filipina wife. they aren’t really ‘in love’.. he simply made an arrangement with her that if she married him and stayed faithful, she could have his money after he dies. these and many other relationship ‘arrangements’ i call ‘Symbiotic’. it’s not love, it’s just a win-win for each partner.

  26. I find it pretty extreme if you have to show her your phone when you get a text. Will you ask her to see her phone too? If as a man you’d act that way in the west (check her phone, go with her everywhere, and so on) you would probably be called all sorts of things. I wonder if they’re equally jealous when they’re with Phillipines men or if they just think they can get away with this with some western men who are maybe more tolerant. I’m just referring to what I’ve heard in these videos, I’ve never had a relationship with a Filipina other than chatting online a bit a long time ago.

  27. Jealousy is an issue when each couple is expecting so much from each other. It is selfishness thinking that what one got wont be hers or his anynore and it will be enjoyed by someone else. It might be that the dedication , love, ,money and attention will go somewhere else.

  28. I have known filipinas Reekay. that do come to america.and once they’re here and married to there American husband,that husbands feels he has her and then he can do what he wants,but no realizing he is ignoring her.and then she will go out after maybe not cheating but wishing she was with different american,got to understand when she gets here, she is on her own,,ty

  29. well… thanks a lot, as a rarity (canadian guy) you just convinced me to book a ticket to the philipines on my next vacation ; )
    I like the idea of having chicks pursuing me for once!

  30. Great video Henry short and sweet I’m thinking about making some videos myself just my past experience, I really want to discuss the point if you get married there is no divorce only annulment, is the option which can cost up to 100,000 pesos and sometimes that is not also a guarantee, I don’t know why after my experience I keep going back, stay single does not need to marry because in my case I know a lot of foreigners when they got married it can turn sour

  31. Thanks so much for your videos. I have a Philipina girlfriend online and have experienced the jealousy and Tampo several times. Now I understand. Thanks again

  32. My Filipino wife is very jealous and selfish and doesn’t hardly communicate with me at all it drives me crazy we have been married for almost 4 yrs but we are separated right now she moved out on me about 2 months ago with our son also she is very hard headed she got mad about me chatting with Facebook female friend in the Philippines and recently I took a trip over to Manila after she moved out and said she didn’t want to be together any more but when she found out I went over there she got mad at me again I don’t understand her

  33. The root cause of jealousy is feeling abandoned as a child, adults revert back to “infant time”, mommy or daddy is not meeting my needs and that gets “emotionally” imprinted and affects adults..Help your mate get to the root cause to overcome it..

  34. LOL ~ At around 7:00 in, there’s a foreigner in the background with a Filipina! What are the chances, given the subject matter.
    Great videos. I have a Filipina wife of 20+ years. It’s never easy!

  35. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I shared this video to my husband as were not together yet. But this topic will help a lot of couples who married a foreigner. As for me, when I felt like being tampo with him, I talk to him. We talk about it. Coz I don’t want to end the day that we have like gap or distance to each other. And being a filipina, I tried to learn more about him, about his culture. Its not easy but it will benefit your relationship moving forward. Appreciate your video and thank u so much for sharing your thoughts to us. 💗💗💗

  36. If I cant trust her in states i would not trust her in Philippines ether. A 24 girl no children with a 60 yr old man is a much higher risk in states than a 30 yr old Philipina with two children who is much more mature

  37. My Philipina wont let me out of her sight it not about jelious it about my protection. Her x BF was the jelious one not her she said that why she dont show jelious often it show lack of trust she said that why she rarely go there she a smart girl know that can destroy a relationship.

  38. My Filipina left her filipino baby daddy he was jealous one. A Filipina under 30 with no kids she may not be mature enough for states. My opinion if she going to cheat on you she will cheat no matter what country you live in. How many guys hit on a girl who see her dad standing beside in the states wearing wedding rings ha ha They may give you dirty looks if they suspect married. However she will be tested under 30 cute immature no children it a different world really open that door for her. .

  39. Me i have to have a girl who is mature of age. I’m almost 40 years of age the youngest i will go for is 5 to 7 years younger then me. I’ve been looking at the profiles of older Filipina women in their 30s and 40s a lot of them don’t even have children they never had kids. Here in the states you have woman in their 20s to 40s they already have two to three or more with the same man or different man. I prefer woman in my age that’s just me.

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