Social Manners in the Philippines, 1of2

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42 comments

  1. Right on with your comments!Politics in philly are not on the forefront of peoples minds there its more about survival and getting through another day so it become something they dont even want to talk much about.The topic of sex is for sure spoken of in private however behind closed doors they are very open about the subject and as far as the swearing it is also taboo to yell or disagree with your partner in public its very fround on .

    1. That’s pretty much the same everywhere. Good manners. Politics too is a dirty word there. You don’t want to ever abuse or yell at your Filippina wife or gf in public believe me. Just don’t do it no matter how frustrated or galit you may be. It is highly offensive and shocking and you will incur the wrath of men in particular and you will be lucky if you get away with it. Don’t say nobody warned you.

  2. So very true. I agree with you.   Some people forget they are no longer in America — or their respective county– and need to understand that they are a guest or paying visitor.  In addition some will go as far as saying their rules and customs don’t apply to them.

  3. As always good stuff. I agree with the politics things and most of them just have the view of all politicians are corrupt and don’t care. The few that do care seem to love one of the biggest crooks ever to come along. As for sex, I found that they are more open to talk about it than I am use to. I don’t cuss much so I never ran into that.

    But the thing I am shocked you didn’t put as number ONE on your list of social forepaw sis “Saving Face”. That is a big thing there and I see so many Americans violating this (I have done it so I know). As you and I know things there are different and many of us Americans get frustrated easily with them. Then we end up getting upset and embearising a Filipino. That is about the worst thing you can do to a Filipino. They would almost rather you stab them with a knife than make them loose face.

  4. Well Henry about sex: it seems my wifes family is always interested.   I get questions in mixed company like.   Are you still active after age 60?   Or they ask my wife if a 6’4″, 250 lbs “foriegner” is not too heavy on top?   They seem interested in how small Asians and Large foreigners handle the size difference relating to coital positions.   When they are talking about sexual response they have a unique way of holding their index finger.  My wifes sisters are between 48 and 70 years old and their husbands are sometimes impotent or partly so.   So in the morning they make hand signals with their index fingers to indicate the degree of turgicity they experienced…..straight or drupey finger. Anyway…they have several nurses and a midwife in the the family so they are used to talking about physical functions.  Sometimes they embarass me. I give non commital or evasive answers to inappropriate questions.  My wife just says….”secret.”   or sometimes quietely rubukes them for asking.   It is a way of teasing, but with a goal of gaining information and also of seeing how we react to bold questions.   Other times the sisters will encourage the older women not to quit having sex with their older husbands even if the wifes desire is gone.  They seem to be genuinely concerned that the husbands do not go without.  She has five sisters still alive and none of them are shy about sex.  My family back home are very conservative Baptists (except I am Catholic) and talk about sex is repressed so this is a big change, but somewhat refreshing.

  5. You mention some of the conservative principles I love about the PH that many are lacking here in the US.  If you don’t have enough basic common sense and class to present yourself well in public … then you don’t belong in my inner circle.  I remember when men used to call people out for using obscene language publicly in front of women and children … I still do it.  Privately among your buddies or close friends is a different matter.

  6. I love how you give people tips and advice. Great videos! But..

    1. Politics. Yeah the government is messed up, everyone that is Filipino and some who are not knows it. Not “all” Filipino doesn’t like talking about it. I don’t know if you have been surrounded by people that don’t want to talk about it, but there are a lot who do, public or not. Every time my parents and I go back to Philippines, we go malls or do fun activities. In malls so many adults/students talk about it, our driver talks about it, taxi drivers, some jeep drivers and passengers talk about it.

    2. The whole sex, dirty jokes and foul language. Again I don’t know if you just happens to be surrounded by people who don’t like it, but again there a lot more people out there who do it. So it’s not entirely frowned upon. My uncles do it, their friends do it, friends of friends, neighbourhood people out in the streets or side/corner shops. And yes there are groups of people who not necessarily want to talk about it but rather find it a little awkward to talk about. Really depends on who you’re talking to. It tends to be the older generation who particularly don’t like talking about as they grew up differently compared to generations now and also the whole “traditional living” or “old ways” compared to now.

  7. When it comes to politics Filipinos only get offended about their own favorite politicians if you talk about how bad they are. When it comes to sex pluto is right everyone I know in Pi likes to joke around about sex movies so on just not the one that is directed to them in an embarrassing way.

  8. When it comes to eating habbit in front of the table just make sure you cook a lot so there won’t be no excuse for anyone not to dig in and pig out.

  9. Sir, might I suggest you find different friends inthe US. The Americans I know are not so brass as you would like others to believe. A Christian is a Christian no matter the company. Please forgive my insites if they offend you.

    1. @LifeBeyondTheSea – Philippines Henry is right. On another note to suggest there are no crass Christians is silly. I knew of a catholic priest who used the f word often. We all thought it was funny. 

  10. Wow Henry I keep finding videos I have not yet seen 🙂 this is a good one with good info,by nature I don’t like to swear,and know when it is ok to talk about things lots of it is common sence,but I diddent know that about political stuff,aw,that’s boring anyway,thanks for sharing as always 🙂

  11. I moved to the Philippines, to get away from all of this foul talk and feminist and male chauvinistic junk…Yes, the locals boy are male chauvinists, but it is controlled especially in public work place…I am called sir, and respected…I am sick of hearing the F word, in a typical conversation..Now, with my wife, depending on her mood and mine, I talk naughty, depending, or I am sinister, but with a smile and she laughs, but it is limited to us, and our way of being naughty, sometimes…But, dirty talk in USA, is just too over the top for me and I try to raise the bar, that both locals and many foreigners not seem to understand…We need more foreigners there, who want to either keep the Philippines, the same, or make it better, not just like home…I not want to see the islands become like the USA…We should give something back, take nothing from it, and make it better and cleaner not worse…I wish to be the solution not the problem…I think the problem is, there are many misconceptions in men’s head, once they get around good girls after they hit a bar…Guys, be mindful, even in Australia, they have the BARRRR and the bar, were you can bring your wife and there is no cussing allowed…Stools are bolted down, for good reason, so, thinking you can talk and act the bar lingo in public makes us all look bad…I’m not perfect, never will be, but I went to the Philippines, to improve myself, make myself better, to raise the bar, for me, my family, and everyone who watches me, and yeah, if you have white skin, and a tummy, you are watched, and judged, every step you make, and fortunately, for me I walk the walk and talk the talk as a real kano, not some bar fly dude who cannot get sex in America, of all places…Hard to believe guys go to nice places like the Philippines, and bring their trash with them and he needs to go to Asian and disrespect girls in the Philippines…If you go too far and not heed the warning, given you by a pinay, you will be approached by security, and by other foreigners who not want you guys making us look bad..If you wish to drop the F bomb, great, go home, go to girly bar, but keep it out of public, but with my skin and fat tummy, everyone is watching me, and I prefer to set a better example..Thanks Henry, for this but I think it will fall on deaf ears…I am blessed with a great wife, 2 super smart kids, and I live in a great city, where being Filipino, is still the respectful way and kanos are still respected…Yes, there are still many local morons, but they are locals and the girls not like them or respect them…Please, I live here, my kids live here, my iwfe suffers enough from the local moronic men, don’t add to it we just want to live in peace

    1. my previous wife was born/raised from tijuana/mx. so for over 15 years, in calif, i was called by ‘enrique’. but here in the PH, they kept saying, ‘reekay’.. sometimes even ‘ricky’. close enough. 🙂

  12. I’m Filipino and i agree with this specially in politics whenever the topic is politics and everyone speaks about it i try to just listen but when they insist that i give word i will and boom 3 or 4 minutes and i notice their lack of interest much as i can i try to stop myself smoothly but i ended up just outright stop.

  13. When I first went to the Philippines, I had several Filipinos/as engage me in political discussions, local, national & international. I know better, now.

    I, as well, discovered – too late – that the long version of B.S. Is, most likely, the worst curse word one can use. In fact, it doesn’t go over well in other SE Asian countries.

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